One can always return

 It has been a couple years since I first thought I would start a blog. I started here, made three posts and well... Pretty much fell off in the wake of a busy season of life. But the fact remains I am still in love with words and using them to inspire and create. And not only that I return now with a dream greater than it was before.

So I'd like to refocus and find a new message to express. I don't expect many people to listen to what I have to say but I'd like to know if one person reads this. So without further ado welcome to the nonsense I call words.  

I really think there's a kind of beauty in coming back to something once forgotten. It's sort of like seeing a childhood friend. Now you both have a career, new stories to tell, and new people you love. But you can still apricate all the good things you had and go forward to make new wonderful thigs. There is no bitterness in growing apart if there was sweetness in being together. Only good things. Memories you can put on a dusty shelf like a good book an admire when things get hard. Not everything will end like a book. Some things end like a cliffhanger on your favorite TV show. One that didn't get renewed for season two. There's still beauty in that. Sometimes a period is just part of a paragraph. 

So how do we say goodbye to things that never got a proper ending? Well I don't have an answer. I'm just a girl in the world. But I do know that every step you take, - weather its a step backwards, forwards, or side to side - still get's you somewhere. A piece in the puzzle of you. A line in the story of your life. So not all endings are something to lament. Not all goodbyes are forever. And even with that all. It's okay to miss things of your past while still loving the things of your present. Just because you loved the last book you read doesn't mean you can't enjoy the new one. 

So just because I left something behind in 2023 doesn't mean that I can't pick it back up in 2025. It's going to be different. It's probably not going to mean anything to anyone. But these words spinning endlessly in my head will have a good home.

And that's the end of these musings of this crazy teen. Back to my crazy life ~

It's okay to ask for help

 

"you will do very well on your own, but with others you will be magnificent" - Enola Holmes 2

Hello Friends I am back<3

So I recently saw this video where a girl was saying "I am a princess I don't need a prince to save me"

Now I agree with this because you aren't better or worse at something because of your gender. So you absolutely can do amazing things by yourself and don't need anyone to tell you what to do. But I also wish we could stop telling are children they don't need anybody. Because I know how it feels. It makes you feel like it's not okay to ask for help. It's like you just have to shoulder the world because you can do it. 

Sometimes all I want is for someone to hold my hand. I can do amazing things but it's hard. And I want someone at my side. I mean Gen Zs grew up with that you can do it by yourself attitude. And now as teens and adults, we find it hard to ask for help. It makes you feel like you are less of a person to ask for help. 

Let me assure you right now, that the best wisdom and courage you can have is to ask for help. It's not saying you have failed. It just means that you shouldn't have to carry all the weight on your shoulders alone. It means you are strong enough to admit you are human. Humans aren't perfect. Humans struggle. You are a princess, you are a prince you are royalty, and you can ask for help.

I know for me it can be so incredibly terrifying to admit I am struggling. If someone asks me how I am I automatically say I am "good" Even if I am at my lowest point, I say I am good. I can't muster the courage to talk to the school counselor. Certainly could never tell my parents. So I know exactly how scary it is. So I wish you luck that you find your prince or princess who will hold your hand every time it hurts. And that you can remember it doesn't make you any less amazing to let them.

You're an amazing human who can do amazing things, and you don't have to do it alone. You are strong.

You're glad helping hand and friend

~Quill

Anger

 

"It's okay to be sad, and even a little mad, but not entirely angry at the world" Willow Chance, Counting By 7s.

   Something I have a lot of experience with is anger, Whether it be controlling it, or bearing its weight, or battling its storm. It follows us relentlessly, in every walk of life. We feel it waiting in the drive through, we feel it when are plans go awry. We feel it with the people we love most. But the thing about anger, it only hurts us. Holding on to anger, it only infects you, it makes you unhappy. It is like a darkness hanging over our souls. 

The other amazing thing about anger? it doesn't have to be there. We can decide to let it go, we can decide to see the good. Really, the world is all about perspective. 

Personally when standing in line hungerly waiting for my food, I never let anger envelope me. Instead I lean on empathy. I think about the waitress, she's probably stress right now, and I really don't need to add to that buy spewing words I will only regret. In fact the best thing I could do for myself is offer a kind smile. In fact the best tool against all anger is empathy. Put yourself in their shoes. 

We always give ourselves grace. If you were the waiter, you would wish these people would stop yelling at you, you didn't get enough sleep, life is hard for you right now. You wish for grace. And yet when roll are reversed you give no grace.

I learned this practice from my grandmother and I really think it is worthwhile. She told me once about her mother. Their relationship was bad, and she told me she had spent so much time hating her, it was hurting herself. And so she would start doing this. She would think about everything she loved about her mother. Every fond memory. And then she could let her anger go. It doesn't matter how long it takes you to come up with something. Find something, and then let more and more things come. Until you can let go of your anger. You don't have to forgive, you don't have to forget, you just have to let go.

 When someone hurts you, you don't need to forgive them. But you can let your anger go. Your anger only hurts you more. Letting yourself dwell on the past will only hurt you more. Forgiveness is not saying "What you did was okay." Forgiveness is saying I choose to let go. 

I choose to let go.

- Your crazy philosophical friend

~Quill

 

Introduction

 

 Welcome to my blog, welcome to my brain. 

Before you continue down this treacherous path, know my brain is a crazy place, you don't want to be here. You have been warned.

Assuming you're still here, let's get down to business. 

I am here for two reasons 

1. I need a place to talk about my crazy world and all my thoughts and idea.

2. I really hope my story can reach those of you out there who feel alone. Hopefully I will bring a smile to your face along the way. 

I don't really know what this blog will contain, but i hope you enjoy!

~ Quill